I used to think that once you fell in love with someone it was destined to be forever. I learned shortly after I had my son that wasnt true. I had the reality check of my life in the year 1997. Pregnant, living with my ailing grandmother and uncle,(had a high risk pregnancy couldn’t live alone) and working at least 12-16 hours a week. I thought it was gonna be the glue that brought me and the dad back together…. nope.
I had the best intentions of making sure my son had an upbringing that centered on respect for himself and others. That if he falls in love just know he doesn’t own that love. I reminded him to keep his hands to himself no matter the case unless his life is threatened by a weapon. I also told him karma is a bitch and treat the one you love like God would. I think he gets it….he is on year 2 of his relationship and they live together no kids…
Love is often mistaken as lust. I’ve loved a few but lusted after many. Sometimes I just wanted my “back stretched out “. I need the foot rubs and quiet conversations about life. I want someone who just wants to live to make me and themselves happy. Don’t fall for my sweet spot first… fall for me.
Bad choices in my past lead me to believe that someone will lead you on until they get what they need from you and then bounce. They played their part though…gotta give em that. I don’t thing we ever lose that passion for a person depending on how things ended. I can turn it off and on to protect myself.
Love is confusing. I started this out trying to phase myself out of believing I got led on to have a relationship and it end up being me, my son, and I. That man said he loved me but he was no good for me. I guess he was right. He gave me a great gift that keeps in giving. My big baby boy who is nothing like him. That’s the eternal love i share with him.
I’m done rambling. If you made it this far thank you!